Each of you have a list of qualities you searching in your future husband/wife, but are the qualities you looking for the right ones for a healthy marriage? This article is thought to help both men and women for a better understanding on what qualities you should poses or better in yourself, as well as what are Muslim men actually looking for in a Muslim wife.
1-Piety: is the first and most important quality you should look for in a Muslim wife. But at the same time, this applies for both male and female. While it’s impossible to know for sure what a person really holds in their heart, you can judge this by looking at certain signs such as : is she making all the 5 prayers a day? wearing hijab? ( this works both ways, you may have a woman that wears Hijab but is not that much of a piety woman, and you have woman that doesn’t wear hijab but love and fear Allah) but a woman that wears the Hijab gives you a better idea of much of a piety woman she is).
Piety can change , you may marry a woman that in the beginning she is very piety and later on in the marriage her piety fades, and the opposite. I find it more common for piety to grow in a marriage though, but let’s not forget both cases happen in real life.
Don’t judge. Which means many men go around looking for the perfect wife, while when it comes to them, they have many good qualities missing. Ask yourself are you the perfect husband?
2- Patience: is very important quality you should look for in a Muslim wife. This quality is important in both parties but when it comes to women, you definitely need a woman that can be patience every time things don’t go her way. You want a wife that will give you less problems, a quite and peaceful house to go to everyday.
Especially as when becoming a mother, patience is a key factor to healthy kids. You don’t want her yelling at the kids and shouting around; and remember things don’t always go right, but you want to make sure that your wife will stay by your side with the love and patience to overcome the difficult times.
3-Appreciation: The lack of appreciation is a bad quality you don’t want. When a woman doesn’t appreciation anything you do for her, things can go downhills because she will never be satisfied and happy no matter what you do. (We know the famous Hadith). Sings that a Muslim woman is appreciative: She rarely complains, she has a positive point of view in life, she doesn’t go around gossiping about people. However, appreciation can be learned; if your wife seem not to really appreciate things you do for her, talk with her and with time Inshallah she will improve and change herself for better.
4-Peacefulness: means no drama! You want a woman that doesn’t bring drama and headache into your life. Less arguments, less drama, more support. Signs of a peaceful Muslim woman: Love the Quran (this will bring tranquility in her life), helps other people in need, learns from her mistakes.
5-Compatibility: comes from all the qualities we wrote above. It takes few good qualities to make a good woman (and man). If a woman is piety, appreciative, peaceful, patience, then no matter what, that’s the kind of woman you should marry. No matter the differences (such as liking different food, movies, being from two different countries ect) compatibility means when you both own the qualities described above.
This tips apply perfectly both to men and women, I focused my article on women only, because I have already wrote an article called ‘5 Qualities to look for in a Muslim Husband’.